Whether I am working in Hypnotherapy, Personal Training, Business Consultancy, and even when giving Seminars, I find a common theme keeps happening:
People focus on what they want, and not on the how and what they need to do in order to get what they want. And sometimes they don’t even get as far as knowing what they want – they remain stuck in what they don’t want.
For example, think about “I want a million pounds.” That’s a great want, a desirable want. And it is achievable, and many people dream it. And yet why do so many people not achieve it?
In my experience people concentrate too much on what they want and not on the important parts – the ‘how’ and the ‘what’ that helps them actually achieve that want. Miss this out and you can want all you like, you’ll probably never achieve it. You’ll remain a dreamer.
So what do you actually want? And with that want, have you even worked out on the how and what you need to do in order to actually achieve it?
In Hypnotherapy clients come to me wanting the end to their depression, anxieties, phobias, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, performance issues amongst so much more – and the majority of the time they are focusing on what they don’t want. Some focus on what they do want. But very few actually focus on the all important journey to get to where they want.
Another example is within fighting. An example I often demonstrate during my fight seminars is how people tend to concentrate on what they don’t want rather than on what they need to do. For example, an ankle lock could be applied, and the fighter struggles like mad to escape, concentrating on the ‘want’ to escape. Yet their focus would be better directed by concentrating on what they need to do in order to actually escape. Its about focusing on what you need to do in order to achieve the want.
This is where I give assistance with coaching as part of my Hypnotherapy service. We work out where people are now, and where they want to be. The points ‘A’ and ‘B’. We work out the further direction for when they have achieved point B. Now we have the journey direction we work on the how and what they need to do to achieve point B and beyond. We remove limitations and add resources so that the client has a clear journey ahead of them. We add emotion to fuel the motivation. We look at the processes to make sure that they are congruent with whom that person is and to mitigate any adverse reactions in their wider ecology – how they live their life and the interactions within.
My good friend and mentor Tom Mullins was told me that you ‘vote with your feet’. Unless you take that first step, you’ll never achieve. So are you taking that first step, and gaining momentum, focusing on the ‘how’ and the ‘what’ that will achieve what you want?